Useless Gift (a past draft)

crossing over the night.., almost wasn't sleep in a week.., prepare a lot for the final day.., spend much time just for made a bunch of stupid folders to make a cyber labyrinth ... buy a laughing jacket.. make an unacceptable song... and try to arranged it in a freaky cd
and let's see the result.. "bingo! i'm just being a looser!!"

i'm just trying to being brave enough.., and i got it..
but suddently.., it happened in front of me..
i must choose one of two things that i really need in this world..
Friendship.. or Love..

i need friendship just because it was very difficult to me to have a friendship.. i'm not like any other guys which have a lot of friends.. i just have some of friends in my side.. have a thousand friends is not enough, but have an enemy is more than enough...

Love.., it wasn't just a feeling.. it more than a life... and sometimes.. it can make me life..
but actually.., love will be complete if ur mate have it too..
and then.., in this case.. unfortunately it just a one-handed love for me..
it is strong and unbeaten feeling of love that i have.., but it wasn't have the lucky.. just one-handed love..
oh my...

so.. with a smile in my face and a heartache.. i'm going home.. burn the cd that i made n turn to sleep..
hmmh..  hyaawn... (but how about the jacket!?)

25 juni

2 org yg brbeda.., lhir di tnggal yg sama nmun tahun yg beda...
msing2 mmiliki pmahaman n pmikiran yg brbeda..
nmun mmiliki tujuan yg sma..

lhir dri kluarga yg bisa dblg krg brkecukupan., nmun mmiliki keinginan mnjadi org besar.., bukan sprti org besar yg duduk di pmrintahan n mnindas rakyatnya. tpi org bsar yg brguna bgi orang bnyak wlwpun tak bgitu kaya raya...

msalahnya.., salah seorang dri mreka sudah mwjudkan mimpinya dan tlah brguna bgi orang2 di skelilingnya dan bgi dunia..., yg seorang lgi.. msihla mnjadi seseorang yg sdikit mlenceng dri tjuan utama.. mlah mnjadi pmbuat onar..

bgaikn lngit dan bumi memang.., tpi tunggulah bberpa tahun atw puluh thun lgi.. kelak si bocah ingusan itu akan mnunjukan fungsi dan kegunaannya di lhirkan ke bumi trcinta ini..

bbeda skitar 50thn..
2 bocah yg sama.., yg dulunya di pndang sebelah mata krn bukan orang yg berada..
brjanji akan mwujudkan mimpinya..

si ilmuwan fisika dan si calon ilmuan kimia..
si mantan president dan si mantan hacktivism jalanan..
Bacharuddin Jusuf Habibie dan Ahmad Barkah Al-haq

a part of u that not mine

hsssskk.., its really annoyed me.. you do that in front of me today...
it make my heart like stopping but it still work properly..
i know it should be non of my business..
but i just want you to know that i'm still already here when you just like hug him in front of the class

yeaah.. well.. hikss..
finally i just can pretend that you're mine.., eventhough it just in my dream...
from someone who always love you... :)]

i wish i...

hmmm.., sometimes i feel i'm too idiot.., b'coz., i can't be like someone else..
who can remember a lot of things.., and can understand what the teacher said just in a single one..
i don't know.., how could this happen to me.., i'm different.., not like them..,

for an example.., when we are read the holy book (Al-Qur'an)
everyone of them has mastered their voice.., they done well.., but not me..,
WHY....???
i'll always nervous when i started to read it in front of them.., i don't know why..,
but something that i always remember...

EVERYONE GET THEIR OWN ABILITIES..., so.., i'll find how to solved this problem..
and find my OWN ABILITIES...